No Direction Home (Paperback)
In 1999, Greg Cayea was sent to Hidden Lake Academy: the most infamous juvenile institution in America touting itself as a "therapeutic boarding school." The school has since been shut down for the tragic maltreatment of troubled youth, but before that, it was a dark place to be. No Direction Home tells the story of the series of events that landed Greg there, what it was like, and how he adventurously escaped.
It starts on the first day of middle school in an upscale neighborhood in Long Island, New York. Greg was labeled the biggest piece of shit in sixth grade because of a few unfortunate circumstances, and there seemed to be no hope for redemption. Then one day everything changed, but it was a bit too late... Greg was on a crusade for vengeance. What ensues is a series of escapades filled with theft, drug addiction, prostitution, suspension, and eventually permanent relocation to many residential rehabs across the country. Still, nothing could calm him down. He was a bit too off the hinges by then for rehabilitation, and after a scuffle with anti-semitic cohorts at one of the inpatient rehabs he ended up at in Louisiana, and after a daring escape with a girl "too good to be true," he's scooped up and transferred to Hidden Lake Academy, a fucked up place tucked in the obscurity of the Appalachian Mountains. From that point on, all bets are off and there is one mission, and one mission only: get out. His attempted escape morphs into a chaotic tale of homelessness, bad crowds, rancid romance, and bravery in all the wrong places, but one thing is for sure... Greg will never be the same.
The question is, will he ever find his way home?
About the Author
I'm 32 and just broke the Guinness World Record for Longest Journey By Car In A Single Country. When I was 31 I published a book. When I was 30 I produced a late-night vaudeville festival. When I was 29 I started a PR Firm. When I was 28 I produced a movie. When I was 27 I moved to LA. When I was 26 I started a rolling paper company. When I was 25 I promoted concerts in NYC. When I was 24 I started a music agency. When I was 23 I produced theatre. When I was 22 I was an actor. When I was 21 I made pizzas. When I was 20 I moved to Boulder. When I was 19 I worked at a tea house. When I was 18 I studied Kung Fu. When I was 17 I got my GED. When I was 16 I hitchhiked all over the country. When I was 15 I ran away from boot camp. When I was 14 I went to rehab in Opelousas. When I was 13 I was the most popular kid in school. When I was 12 I was the biggest loser in school. When I was 11 I hung out in the projects. When I was 10 I loved skateboarding. When I was 9 I became addicted to club soda. When I was 8 my family moved from a condo to a house. When I was 7 I told my first grade teacher I spoke Spanish. But i didn't. I was speaking gibberish. When I was 6 I got the chicken pox. When I was 5 I made friends with a Persian kid and pretended to speak Farsi with him. When I was 4 I rode a unicycle. When I was 3 I passed my series 7. When I was 2 I hiked the Pacific Crest Trail. When I was 1 I was a world famous hand model. That's how I got to where I am now.